MONEY MONEY MONEY
Fascinating to have posted on my personal Facebook account a while back about financial well-being. Not a lot of likes and comments on the post, but the personal messages sure did roll in. I reposted on Instagram only to find the same results.
Let’s be honest. Everyone would like more money.
And how about having your own versus relying on your partner, husband, parents, siblings, investors… imagine what could be done.
Any way you look at it, money allows us to do amazing positive lovely beautiful giving things in the world.
Such a taboo topic though, yeah?
Thus the personal messages on my social media posts.
My money story is interesting. It’s not the worst. It’s definitely not the best.
First, I am from the South where most people do not talk about money. It’s not proper etiquette. And I get that. But I’m not sure that totally sets one up for success if it is not spoken about at all, even within immediate family. Other than hearing once at 40+ years old, “So are you making any money yet, or what?” Given my upbringing, I was stunned and did not know how to respond.
Second, I don’t come from a ton of money. I come from more money than most kids in this world. I may or may not compared to many in first world countries. And certainly not compared to many in the beautiful places I’ve chosen to live. That has certainly gifted me with respect for the value of the dollar, grit, and hella tenacity for which I am beyond grateful.
My learning was:
… that money was hard to come by
… that it was to be put in my savings account - every single penny
… it was not meant to be used for fun
… that we were to “make do” with what we had
… to not expect much
… to dare not think anyone would just hand me a $1
… that every penny only came from many hours of hard work
… that there would be zero assistance in any way, so if you want to get some, you’ve got to go figure that out for yourself without any further conversation around it in any way
And all of that is fine as I understand where my family of origin is coming from…
However, it imprinted a SCARCITY mindset that was hard to shake.
It has never mattered how much money I’ve made, there was always the WORRY that there would not be enough and that it would eventually disappear, and that there would eventually be an experience akin to the Great Depression. Sure enough, the Great Recession appeared and even though well-prepared given this “prepare for the worst” mindset, I was hit hard and simultaneously blown off as it was not as severe as The Great Depression, so whatever Joni, quit being so dramatic. Le Wow. (Insert: Forgive. Forget.)
So, yep, we pick ourselves up, put our big girl pants back on, pull them up higher and higher each time and get back to work. Until we fall out due to adrenal fatigue. What the hell is going on in this world?!
When we look at mindset, this upbringing could not be more opposite of a positive growth mindset. Due to the Great Depression, it is extremely common and understandable within that generation. Many of us grew up with this imprint. However, times have changed immensely and there are now so many amazing ways, embracing the better components of technology, to leverage what we have, or even what we do not yet have, and MIND the GAP.
Open your eyes, open your mind, open your heart, and a lot can become OK in stepping into something unusual, perhaps a little scary, different, and omg actually supportive.
Truly, one of the biggest moral implications of this era in America and other First World countries is wealth and income inequality - the massive crisis we are now facing today.
Worrying imprints, over and over, the thought that there may not be enough - of anything - love, family, security, happiness and TIME.
Our thoughts create our reality. So if you are worrying those things might go away, or that they may never appear, or that there won’t be enough, then YES, that will be the case.
If you are dependent on others for any of these things, because your core beliefs are that you can’t have them without the help of someone else, or that you are not good enough, smart enough, fast enough, worthy enough, then, YES, you will forever be dependent on another for income, a job, ownership of a business, nice clothes, nice cars, nice dinners, child-support, stability, so-called security.
See where we are going here?
So in order to change our pocketbooks and become truly self-reliant, it’s time to put on the big girl pants, and go deep within.
My communities are hard at work supporting people with these shifts day in and day out.
We are ready to support you in shifting your MONEY story.
Bonus Pro Tip: GRATITUDE
When you pay bills, find gratitude around having the money to pay bills.
When money rolls in, even if you find a penny on the ground, find gratitude.